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Jameela's August 2013 Column: "Live For The Moment'


So my best friend doesn’t have a lot of luck with girls. The ones he likes are often, for lack of a better word, arseholes. And the ones who like him, he doesn’t have any spark with.

But, six weeks ago, this all changed. He met a beautiful, funny and smart girl... who, low and behold, liked him back. Hallelujah! The whole thing was immediate. They had nothing in common and yet everything to teach each other. He was laughing more. His job stopped bothering him. He had a spring in his step. He came to life. Incredible! Of course, there was a glitch. She was leaving. Forever. You see, she’s from the other side of the world and her visa runs out at the end of the summer. Unbearable.

So my question of the month is... Do you go all in for something and make the most of every second, even if you know it might be short-lived and very painful? Or, do you protect yourself and shut it down, before it’s even started?

I’m proud to say, against everyone’s advice, apart from mine, he went for it! They lived in each other’s pockets for those six weeks. Showed each other things that can never be taken away, and shared moments that can never be replaced. And sweet Jesus, someone fi nally taught that 28-year-old man how to cook!

But now… I walk into his room to fi nd him curled up, a face ravaged by tears and longing. She’s gone. And taken his little heart with her. Their goodbye was beautifully brutal. But even now, when I asked him if it was worth it? He whispers, “Yes”.

I too don’t believe in protecting yourself if it means missing out on actually feeling something – be it good or bad. You can never guarantee that you won’t get hurt but I can tell you from my own experiences, it’s the things in life you don’t do, that you regret. I’ve learnt so much more from my trials than I have my triumphs. Ten years ago, a car hit me and took my life away for two years. It taught me the signifi cance of making the most of the moment. Tomorrows are terrifyingly unpredictable. But if there is someone in front of you who may or may not be forever, I urge you to grab them. All we really have is the now. So you may as well enjoy it!

Ultimately, my friend’s pain will fade, but the memory of the summer with one of the most wonderful women he could ever hope to meet, never will. And, who knows? They may even see each other again. I hope so. I miss their cooking...And she still has one of my dresses. Awkward.

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